My underwear smells like fireworks.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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