so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize