What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
