careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
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