just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
