NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
