there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
