last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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