I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
