you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
