i think my mom watched the whole time
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do