i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
