How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
