So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize