Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
