Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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