you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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