You're completely useless in the revolution.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
