Are we in a gay sports bar?
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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