NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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