I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
