I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
