just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize