maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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