Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize