why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
