She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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