The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
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