omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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