nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize