there was a trapeze. enough said
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Are we still banned from the library?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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