party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
People in love make me want to vomit
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
We're too hungover to prance.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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