Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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