I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I have tasted many bathrooms
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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