I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
