it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
