My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize