i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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