His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize