So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
