she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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