MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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