her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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