you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
