i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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