There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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