I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize