I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
