there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
