Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Text me some of your sweat
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
