Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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