Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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