He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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